'Lost'/DIED ??

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Topic started by 'loverman'

I live in Cambridge. I'm not wedded to the place. I generally get on best with men in their 30s/40s. Arts interests mostly ,politics and cars - bit of an anorak as far as cars are concerned!. I prefer spending time with men who don't smoke or see getting plastered and throwing up as one of the joys of life. Friends of Bill W welcome. No Leos, please. I'm not usually bothered

A topic from Mind, Spirit & Beliefs: Miscellaneous

lovermanSat 05/11/11 21:03

I heard a profile on Radio 4 tonight where the person featured was described as having lost both his parents when he was a teenager.

His parents had both died.

My father died in 1955 when I was 3. back then we talked of people dying - 'Lost' had not become a softer word for the fact of someone dying. and the phrase "I am sorry for your loss" had yet to cross The Atlantic.

For me, talking of someone as dying makes it more real, and gives the chance of dealing with the death. 'Lost' seems yo almost take the edge off it. I'd have found it very hard(it was hard enough anyway) if i had not been taken to my father's grave quite often, and so knew that he had truly died, and so we all had to find a way forward.

I'd be interested to know what other OUTers think.

azzet1Sat 05/11/11 21:16

I agree.

I am a nurse and often have to break bad news to people.

I always say "so and so died a few minutes ago" so there is absolute clarity.

I hate phrases like "passed on" or " has gone to a better place" and stuff like that.

Some people are not very good or indeed comfortable dealing with death.

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